Reason & Concern

by Ronquillo C. Tolentino

Humor On Billboards

of Churches

A week　back, I tried to determine where I can be of help in the preparation of the 16th National Press Congress on December 8-10, 2011 at Boracay Island, Malay, Aklan together with the Media Global Forum sponsored by the Publishers Association of the Philippines, Inc. (PAPI) and the Boracay Global Press Corps (BGPC).　

Although, I had earlier meet with PAPI president Johnny P. Dayang, former congressman and BGPC adviser, Atty. Allen Salas Quimpo, Madyaas Pen publisher-editor Ambrosio R. Villorente and some officers of the Aklan Press Club, I had manifested that the Philippine Red Cross biennial convention at the Manila Hotel also falls on the same date as the National Press Congress and Media Global Forum and I had already communicated of my attendance as chapter president of the Aklan Red Cross.

An email from my cousin,book author Girlie (Rashmi) Tolentino Singh about humor on churches billboards in certain United States counties came. The church billboards signs inclusive of new churches signs are funny.　 I am herewith reproducing some which I selected and have it reproduced for humor’s and laughter’s sake. No offense meant though.

Our Savior’s Church – "You may party in hell but you will be the barbeque!

First Reformed Church of Bethlehem – "Keep using my name in vain.　 I’ll make rush hour longer – God."

Claude Prebyterian church – "There are some questions that can’t be answered by Google."

Ray of Hope Community Church – "Thou shall not steal the cooper from the AC unit.　 Please call 227-4110."

Christian Fellowship Church – "Church parking. Trespassers will be baptized."

First Baptist Church – "Worship 10 a.m.　 Who’s your Daddy?

South End Baptist Church – "Whoever is praying for snow, please stop."

The First Church Awesome Works – "How do we make Holy Water? We boil the hell out of it!."

River Falls Baptist Church – "Adam blamed Eve. Eve blamed the snake and the snake didn’t have a leg to stand on.

Church of God of Prophecy – "Every day above ground is a good one."

And these new church signs : "The best vitamin for a Christian is B1."

"Try our Sundays. They are better than Bankin – Robbins."

"You are not too bad to come in. You are not too good to stay out." "Can’t sleep? Try counting your blessings."

"Try Jesus. If you don’t like Him, the devil will always take you back."

"Life is Hard. After life is Harder!"

"Aspire to inspire. Before you expire."

"Under the same management For over 2,000 years." /MP